She remembers her first impression of the Young Master Jin.
Cold, arrogant, insensitive.
These were words that popped into her head against her own will. She couldn’t help it, he had been so mean to her. Always speaking badly about her, how she was a boring girl. And she had believed him, despite everything. She was an impressionable child, easily falling for such words, especially when it came from someone who she was supposed to fall in love with and live with for the rest of her life.
She believed him, and it had degraded her self-appreciation ever since. No matter how delicious a meal she made or how elegantly she showed off a new dance she learnt, one indifferent glance from that man would shatter her confidence completely. She never let this show to her brothers though, knowing they would quickly come to her defense. They had always been ridiculously sweet to her, after all.
Everytime their parents brought them together to meet up, she did what she could to not offend him, keeping conversation light and sticking to topics that would not cause conflict. In hindsight, she supposes that’s probably what made his impression of her worsen, that Maidan Jiang had nothing to say, seemingly only spending time with him to please their parents.
She had to admit, that was how it was. Yanli did not like him very much, but knowing how much her mother wanted the engagement to go through, she stuck to it as her duty to her sect. That’s all it would ever amount to, she thought.
At least that was true until one day, at the age of thirteen. That year, she had once again been making her way to Koi Tower to spend time with Jin Zixuan. She had almost made it there when she happened to see a familiar face bent down around a few children.
It was Jin Zixuan, and while she couldn’t see well, she was able to tell that he was playing with the children, entertaining them by being the clown. That was when a new emotion for him sprouted within her, a certain fondness.
She paid more attention to the things he said and did, and quickly found out, that everything he said and did was not meant to harm, but were either interpreted wrongly or phrased badly. He considered himself someone of good standing, and as such, believed he had to act the part as well. It came across as standoffish, but she could finally see his true intentions.
He was no longer cold, arrogant and insensitive. Now he was kind, proud and maybe a little awkward.
She changed her mindset towards things. She moved around with more confidence; confidence that he did not despise her, that he did not believe her to be as worthless as she once thought.
Her hopes were finally realized after the incident during the Sunshot Campaign, where he confessed to her with a bright red blush on his face. She accepted him gratefully, eyes gleaming with happiness, only rivalled by her radiance on her wedding night.
And now, she lies in bed with her husband and their newborn son, a little surprised but absolutely delighted that things worked out this way. Fate had a strange way of working its magic, after all.
Name: Sabi Twitter: kataangy98
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